Strawberries and Sadness
by CaelnThoria
Summary: guh, first NnyxDevi story...iunno. I'm worried it sucks just as much as I think it does. Still, read and giveth me your opinion! No flames, nothing harsh please use judgement when concritting. Also, re uploaded in correct readable format!


Title: Strawberries and Sadness

Pairing: NnyxDevi

Rating: PG-13

Song for inspiration: White Houses, Vanessa Carlton.

Disclaimer: I do not own JTHM, or I Feel Sick. Both characters belong to Jhonen Vasquez, I'm just borrowing them for a little while, for my own purposes. I promise I will put them back where I found them, J.V!

He had never left his house in such a rush. Something inside him screamed, something had torn him apart inside causing him to shriek and shrink away from the boy he was torturing. Voices, so many voices tearing through his mind...all of the screaming, just screaming one thing again and again.

_"Devi. De**vi**. D**evi**. **Devi!"**_

He'd stumbled up the stairs, blindly reaching for his coat, feeling this all above...panic in his chest. What was causing this intense feeling? This intense fear...for Devi? His boots pounded on the pavement, rain pouring down on him like a sleet of a waterfall, leaving him cold...soaked to the bone. He had a small clue as to what neighbor hood she lived in but he'd only walked her home a couple times...couldn't remember for the life of him what building. His feet met the sidewalk and gave him the strength to keep pushing towards Devi's home, his arms pumping wildly at his sides hoping to give him the speed his body desperately craved for him to get.

Several times the boy had slipped, crashing to the concrete with a gasp of agony as more skin was torn open, blood dripping down his cheek, from his scraped up temple. All those people who made cracks at him were not heard, they were not seen as Johnny ran. Ran and ran and ran for Devi.

Devi's Place

She stared emotionlessly at the boxes being slowly packed away into the bright white truck. It was time for a change. Time to leave this town...head someplace nicer. She was thinking California...she had a few friends who had moved there before her and had offered her a place in their homes. It was time to leave..time to pack away the pictures of her and Johnny. She couldn't burn them like she had sworn she would that day. She had picked one up, Johnny's arms locked around her...they were both laughing in the photo-booth, and the following one had made Devi laugh.

_She'd pushed Johnny against the wall of the photo-booth, _snap_ she had brought her face close to his, their eyes locking - mischievousness and surprise. _snap_ Devi leaned in, Johnny leaned up...their mouths locked together. _snap

She had stared at their pictures together for a good hour, stroking Johnny's face against the film...he was still breathtakingly handsome as she'd seen him the first time he'd walked through the book store door and their eyes had met. She had giggled when he blushed and stuttered his way through an order of books that he was buying. Their fingers had brushed, electrical shocks had passed through the both of them. He kept coming by to see her after that.

But now she was alone, once more, staring at the rain that was pelting her boxes. Things had been so amazing...their first kiss had been...amazing. The second one...had been disastrous, she still shuddered when grasping her kitchen knives.

Johnny

He clutched at his chest, whining softly at the burning ache there. God how far away did she live from his house? He knew she lived in the city, as he pushed a dripping lock of blue hair from his face. Whimpering he forced his pulsing legs to take off once more, running down the street -

"Devi!? Devi! Where are you!?" He cried, looking around. He shouted a couple more times until someone tapped him on the shoulder. He twisted to see a tanned skinned girl with dark green eyes. She stared at him quietly before questioning him.,

"Why you lookin' for Devi?" She clutched a small black and white skeleton doll to her chest which emitted a small squeak.

"I..I don't know..i...I just need to find her. Do...you know...know where she...?" The girl nodded, and squeaked the doll softly.

"She's packing her stuff up, moving to California. She's about ready to leave...if you wanna catch her before she leaves just keep heading down the street and turn left at the corner." The girl said as the shock washed over Johnny. Cali...for..nia? That was over 3,000 miles away!! His feet moved on his own as the rain picked up, drenching the boy as he tore down the street.

Tenna smiled softly, "I don't know Spooky...Johnny seems nice. Don't you think?" She asked, a small squeak was her answer and she nodded happily, disappearing into the cafe.

Devi's Place

She sighed softly, watching the door of the truck slid shut..."So...yeah, just take it to the address I gave you. I'll be out there in a week..." The driver nodded, and took off. She watched him go, sighing. A new life, Devi. New life...no Sickness. No Nerve. No Johnny. She blinked, hearing the sounds of running foot steps. Turning, the woman dropped her umbrella as Johnny skidded to a stop in front of her - she felt her heart seize up in her chest as the maniac stared at the truck driving away.

"..Yo...you are leaving...aren't you?" He asked softly, breathless and looking pained. His hand was clutching at his chest, the burning inside was too much for him to handle as he leaned against the wall heavily. Devi nodded, frightened and curious as to why Johnny was here. She decided to ask.

"W...why are you here, Nny? What...y...you didn't come to finish to job did you?" She asked, hugging her arms over her chest. Johnny's eyes fluttered - Nny. She called him Nny. God to hear that nickname from her lips...**her**voice.

"..What? No, no...I..I...had to come see you. I...it was all I could think about, Devi...seeing your face...I...ran all the way from my house. I...I was scared you were hurt...all I could see what you...torn and bloody...I...it" He fought his tongue for the right word as fear gripped her visage again - "...I was scared, Devi. Scared you were hurt." He breathed._God above, I want to touch her again._

He ran? From his house...God that was a long distance...about 5 miles. She stared at the man standing there looking so lost, and drenched like a kitten after a bath. She sniffled softly, taking a hesitant step forward.

_"Touch him. It'll be so much easier if you touch him. Let him hold you."_ She heard Sickness's voice crackle in her mind as another step was taken. She couldn't really ever deny the fact that she did feel connected to Johnny, at all times, and to touch him was a guilty pleasure she'd been thinking of - so she did this. Abandoned her fears, abandoned all hopes of getting away...and crushed herself against his body tears trembling from her eyes as she shook in his arms.

Johnny's back connected with the brick wall, his fingers digging into her back softly as she clutched herself at him, her fingers pushed up under his shirt - her fingertips were freezing against his back, but he didn't mind the touch from her.

"Devi..." He whispered, laying a tender kiss to her head - "...I just think about how bad I want to take it all back...I kept wanting to call you...all the time..." She smelled so good...strawberries and rain. Her green eyes looked back at him, full of tears and...sadness.

"I wish you could...but...you can't." She said slowly standing up - his fingers went tight, and she flinched knowing he wasn't going to let her go. "It can't be taken back, it can't be forgotten...what you do...to those people? I...can't even wrap my mind around a sweet guy like you wielding those knives..." She sniffed softly, as he wiped her tears away with his thumbs -

"You're still so beautiful..." He murmured, catching her off guard. "You're so much prettier than I ever expected one woman to be...especially one who liked me. But..but...i guess you are right...i can't take it back. I can't take back anything I did. I offered you my nothing -" He was cut off by Devi's smack on his cheek. He stared, clutching his stinging cheek.

"Don't want your nothing. I just...want you. You and your everything..." She said, touching his cheek gently..."But we can't...can't erase what happened between us-" His finger touched her lips softly.

"Don't worry...I won't stop you from leaving...I won't force you to stay here..." He said softly..."Just..know, Devi...that I'll be here...until you come back." He said quietly, licking his lips. "You...should go back upstairs before...heh...before I start crying and thats never a good look for me." He said, smiling thickly at her. A fresh wave of tears exited her as she leaned in, their mouths brushing together.

"..I'll miss you Nny.." She whispered, and he nodded. He stood there, watching her go sighing as he heard the door shut.

Love wasn't for Johnny. Romance would end in death for the other person, because he couldn't control his urges to kill when pushed past excitement. But she knew he'd be here for her. He would always make time for Devi.

There would be no exception.

end 


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